Escape the labyrinth of depression

Depression is a sly little thing, it’s something that once you get acquainted with, it’s hard to get unacquainted.  Once you start, it somehow barges into your life so much that in the end being depressed becomes a habit, a go-to move your brain takes every time anything big or small happens. Suddenly you find yourself in a cycle of waking up wishing a sharp sword would just cut through your chest and falling asleep to the thought of getting into a car crash.

I, myself found my way out of the labyrinth of depression just last year after 6 years of hopeless wandering, fighting whatever the labyrinth threw at me. And although the labyrinth comes in different forms for everyone, I thought I should outline a couple of tips to help those still stuck in there to get out faster.

1. Learn what your depression is based on

Now in my previous post ‘Primarily Learned‘ I told you about my victim mentality and how I grew up more than half of my life without my parents. I grew up spending a lot of time alone without family or friends and I grew up convinced that what I needed to be happy was to have them. I was depressed that no one was there for me and that I had no one to lean on. So this was the very base of my depression, the fact that I convinced myself that the formula to happiness is something that I didn’t have.

Everyone has formulated their own formula to achieve happiness. ‘If I have that, I’d be happy’ ‘If I achieve this, I’d be happy’ ‘If only I could do ___, I’d be happy’ ‘If only I/they was better, I’d be happy’ And with these formulas we confine happiness to a certain set of things and without them we’d never feel that ultimate happiness. What we need to learn is to let go of this formula. The things we convinced ourselves that we needed to be happy, we need to let those go. Now I moved to Germany alone and I have spent the past 7 months without friends but I spend each day happy and not put down by the thought that I need friends to be happy. You may think this only works in my situation but if you simplify and simplify and simplify your problem to its basis your mind would be so much clearer. Is the ultimate basis that you’re trying to make two parties happy when there’s no way for the two parties to be happy? Or what is it for you? Once you get down to the basis, the way out of the labyrinth is much clearer.

2. Enjoy the little things and realize it’s not okay to be depressed.

I said it, realize it’s not okay to be depressed. These days, everyone’s going around saying it’s okay to be sad and depressed. It’s okay. NO. When I saw those post when I was depressed I just saw it as an excuse, ‘it’s fine, they said it’s fine for me to be depressed’

I know that realizing that it’s not okay to be depressed is not the equivalent to not being depressed. You don’t just realize and suddenly you’re able to control your depression and I’m not telling you to tell yourself off and fell bad about being depressed. The point is to move your mindset out of depression becoming a habit and an instinct.

I said it in my ‘Primarily Learned‘ post and I’ll say it again. Enjoy the little things. Really just stop and appreciate. Do not live your life looking downwards, shrinking your whole world to just one patch of darkness but look up at marvel. It does not take a whole lot to feel a bit of happiness. Do not aim for some sort of unattainable, possibly non-existent ‘ultimate happiness’. I personally feel a bit of happiness just looking at the colour yellow. It’s spring, look at the colours around you, look at new life budding all around you and if you’re in the South Hemisphere, bro, GO EAT SOME FEIJOAS!!! (I can’t even get them here!) Enjoy. The. Little. Things.

3. Incorporate feeling accomplished into your life and challenge yourself

How I actually got out of depression is that I worked for a company 6 days a week 12-16 hours a day. I had the most responsibility in the company other than the boss and I just had no time to be depressed. I had no time at all to think negative thoughts. I was either exhausted or concentrating on work. Even though I worked so much, I enjoyed it, I felt very accomplished and I was pushed beyond what I thought my limit was.

A way to feel accomplish is to challenge yourself. Now I’m not telling you to join a sweatshop and work till you die. The challenge you set for yourself does not need to be on a huge scale. Now that I’m not in that environment anymore, I challenge myself with the smallest challenges. For example, where I’m staying there’s a trampoline, I challenged myself to do a front flip. I bounced and I bounced for so long and I did not manage to accomplish my challenge BUT during the time I was bouncing I was giggling so hard because the fear of doing a front flip charged my body with adrenaline so that even though from the outside it just looks like I’m bouncing, I’m internally freaking out and it was so. much. fun. The result of the challenge does not have to be perfect but you should enjoy the attempt.

 

Although finding your way out of depression isn’t as easy as unfriending someone on Facebook, you definitely can do it. GIRL/BOY you. can. do. it. What you also need to do is to not make getting over depression as big of a hurdle as you think. Getting over depression is not feeling of ultimate happiness or loving yourself to the uttermost, but going ‘hey, today wasn’t so bad.’ ‘hey, this week wasn’t so bad’ ‘hey, these negative thoughts are appearing less and less’. Jump over the first hurdle and keep on slowly getting better and better. If you relapse don’t worry, but learn to catch yourself each time your brain’s go-to move is to be depressed, realize it.

If anyone else has their own experience they want to share to the other people looking at this post, whether you’ve already walked out of the labyrinth or if you’re still fighting to get out, please do. With more people and experience maybe more people can get out faster. Advice or questions are 1000000000000000000000000000% welcome. If you’d like to contact me privately to tell me your situation in depth, or if you just need support please tell me. Who cares if we don’t know each other? I will support you like I supported others. I will write 1000 word essays to you and whatnot. Like if you think this was helpful in any way, and follow for more posts.

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3 thoughts on “Escape the labyrinth of depression

  1. piezoradeon says:

    I’ve had a fair share of experience when I was depressed and stuff.
    I always loved and even now dream to fly a plane in the airforce, I was selected and during meds I was rejected because I was taller than required by 2 millimetres (0.2 of a centimeter! even a mosquito is larger than that!)
    Well, I was depressed , but I got into navy.
    I joined navy and then last December I had to leave it as I had five fractures and ligament tears in both the legs.
    I lost my legs (temporarily), my job and career ( permanently) and my dream!
    I was pretty depressed and all the negativity was pouring all over me.

    One day, I happened to be on the street (I couldn’t walk at that time, I was in a car going to the hospital) that I saw a kid about five years old helping his parents. His dad seemed to be blind and his mother didn’t have her arms.
    That’s when I realised, I don’t have any problems like that kid! I can survive! I am not dead!
    Since, then had a remarkable improvement in attitude and my legs started to improve faster (as they say, it’s all in the mind, yes it is!)
    Its about what you choose, You choose negative thoughts over positive ones, you are the culprit, you choose good ones and are happy, well that’s what one wants in life!
    I still have episodes of frustration about life and all for a few hours, I get over them in a while.
    That too will pass in a while.
    I now have lost four years of my life while all my friends are looking for a job, while I am writing entrance exams to get into college now! (Yeah I joined navy after 12th)
    Well, that’s life deal with it! You feel pleasure when you succeed. Wheres the fun when you always succeed with o ups and downs
    I also accepted a mantra ” THIS TOO SHALL PASS” works always. When you are sad, you know that good times are just around the corner. If there are good times, it reminds me not to go overboard with success but be ready to fall anytime, always stay down to earth!
    Now I walk and jog! I can’t run long distances, but when I run like about 5 km (the max I can without me getting serious pain in my bones and knees) I feel the happiest man on earth!
    Just a simple thing – you think happy you will be happy! depression is just a wrong choice!

    I really am sorry for this long comment and possibly bored you to death , I could’ve posted this on my blog as well :p

    Liked by 2 people

    • obsessionprone says:

      I don’t even know what to say what wow! I feel like rather than walking out of the labyrinth you just paved down the walls and created your own path. Yeah, a lot of it has to do with removing your mindset from the darkness and remove the clouds clouding your heading one by one. What are you studying now? I’m pretty late into the University life as well, I start this October where as my friends as graduating this November. But all in good time

      Like

      • piezoradeon says:

        I finished my 12th like three and years ago, and I am looking up for getting into an engineering college, entrances in may though :p ( literally I don’t remember any of the stuff I studied back then) and will be joining in august! some of my friends finished college and two have a job too! Well, I don’t regret that. (They haven’t had the experience that I have, they haven’t seen the world like I did in the navy – It’s a matter of perspective… either squander in self pity about u being behind them or think the better way! – Yes navy taught me this and I am proud of my experience!)
        What would you be studying now? and All the best for it too! Mind if we could email?

        Like

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